Gail (gailmarie) wrote,

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I shot the sheriff, but I swear it was in self-defence

First off, I would like to say that I had the most incredible night's sleep last night...mainly because I didn't have to get up for classes this morning. However, in between very satisfying and restful bouts, I had the most awkward and awful dreams. In one, I was being forced to shoot this guy in my basement and I was in hysterics and ended up only getting his arm. (I'm fairly certain that is from watching "Lost" where the redneck-hick guy shoots the dying US Marshall guy...I don't know names yet...I just started watching.) In another one, I having a hard time sleeping, so I got up to put a blanket on my cousin's dog Shelby (who has been dead for a few years now), who had recently been shaved and I figured was cold, but then everyone woke up and I couldn't get back to sleep. And it was an odd mix of the people who used to live in my Aunt's house, and the people who are currently living with my sister (in the same house). Shelby and Whitney were both there, but Annie and Austin weren't. Stephanie and Staci were there, and my dad, sister, and Aunt Judy...but not my mom. Strange.

Next, on a slightly more cheerful note: the IMDb news today is filled with celebrities and children. It seems to be the new fad, doesn't it? If they aren't pregnant, they are adopting. And the even more popular...hook up with someone who already has kids.

1) Britney Spears had her baby boy, Preston Michael Spears-Federline (husband Kevin Federline already has two kids)
2) Angelina Jolie has adopted her second child, a starving Ethiopian baby named Zahara. She already has an adopted son(?), Maddox.
3) Matt Damon has announced his engagement to 17-month girlfriend, Luciana Barroso. Barroso has a 6-year-old daughter from a previous relationship.
4) Heidi Klum reportedly gave birth to her son (with singer/performer Seal) yesterday, though nothing is official. Klum has a one-year-old daughter from a previous relationship.

In a side what world does Heidi Klum marry Seal??????

I saw THE MOST fucked up movie EVER tonight. I don't care what you throw at me, this one takes the cake. It's an independent film by a professor at UCF, Bob Jones, and his class from a few years ago. It is called Fetus Fetish and the plot is actually MORE bizarre that the title suggests. First, there's a guy who collects fetuses from an abortion clinic. His girlfriend leaves him, so he needs to audition a new lead singer for his band. The new girl, Bonnie, hooks up with him, and his best friend/roommate, an aspiring director of "adult entertainment." Bonnie decides a good idea for a new porn film would be her with a paralyzed man, who happens to be the director's boss (he sells car vacuum cleaners when not shooting porn or spying on the neighbor under the guise of "looking for aliens"). One of the fetuses is apparently still alive, and starts to stalk Bonnie because it was her unborn baby with an alien that she unintentionally had sex with when she was really drunk.

That was the basic storyline, though there were also sub-plots about fetus-collector's ex-girlfriend stealing money from the abortion clinic she worked at, and her boss hires an Italian detective, who ends up sleeping with the girl's mother. The fetus-collector and director also have a few scenes where they are trying to self the crappy vacuums, but fetus collector keeps saying stupid shit like "it will even suck up a bowling ball" and "it works great on blood" and losing the sales. Oh, and Bonnie is a Mormon, which comes up in various jokes throughout.

I guess it had potential...but oh my god. It was just crazy and BAD. The sound quality was very poor and too noticeable, the lighting was awful, the acting wasn't horrible, but wasn't quite redeeming either. I think the best aspect was the average editing.

This makes me not want to make films, because if this sucked so much, I probably won't be able to do much better. Eek.

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