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And I'm in an over emotional way...

God, today has been long. Long and hard.

School. Of course, classes as normal. Kids as normal. Like nothing happened. So very upsetting to me, but there's nothing I can really do. I gave money to Student Council who will be sending it to the American Red Cross, but it doesn't seem like enough. I wish I could go give blood, or something.

In English today we wrote narratives using a line from "This Land is Your Land" by Woody Guthrie. Mine was a short 1st person account of a survivor, that I got the opportunity to read aloud to the class. I'm glad I did too.

We had swimming in Outdoor Adventure today. Because the class is totally unorthodox, all we really did was wade around in the pool. We will be canoeing and kayaking in the next few days. I'm deathly afraid of drowning, so when in the deep end, I cling to the wall, but had fun none the less. It's a good class setting, and Mr. Zima is the best.

Play practice after school. Because we missed a day yesterday, we tried to cram both days worth of work into today. We did, but ended up getting out late (at 6:15, instead of 6). This is where my day went from fine on the verge of good, to sucky on the verge of terrible.

I call my mom's cell, because I have this feeling no one is at home. Indeed, she is at the tattoo place (she, my aunt Judy and sister Ci all got tattoos tonight.) She basically told me that she couldn't give me a ride home. Okay, now what? She suggested I call my brother, but his cell has been broken. She says I should try his girlfriend's cell, and while she's searching for the number, her cell wonks out and we get disconnected. I tried my aunt's cell, but it wasn't working either. I decide to see if there is anyone around that I could get a ride from. Nope. No one. I go back to the phone and try my sister's cell. I ask it mom was still looking to Katie's number, and she sounds surprised that I called. Mommy had apparently given up looking for the number when she couldn't find it, and didn't bother to tell me. Great. Ci gives me Katie's cell and home numbers. I try them both. No answer at both. Okay. It's now 6:25. None of my family is closer than 30 miles and I'm stranded at school. I could walk, but it's quite a hike, and my backpack was incredibly stuffed with homework compacted from two days. Gotta love teachers, they hate falling behind. I call Candace. Ask her to come pick me up, and try not to sound like I'm about to cry, though I am. She does and I resolve that I have the absolute best friends ever.

Get home at 6:45. Realize that to do my physics homework, I need graph paper. I need to get gas anyways, so I climb into the car for the short trip to Office Max and Amoco. As I'm filling up with gas, I remember that I have movies to return to Blockbuster. Stop home, grab movies, run to Blockbuster. Finally get back home at 7:45. Start making dinner around 8, and mom calls. Zoe's being annoying so I have to come get her and take her home. Grrr! I swear, at this point, I lost it. I got off the phone with my mother and scream aloud. Not overly loud, but definitely prolonged. It had been a long day as it was. It was 8 already, and I hadn't eaten anything, nor had I started my truckloads of homework. Now I have to drive a half an hour to pick up a child who's acting up and take her home. Fantastic.

In the car on the way to the tattoo place, I start crying. Not just crying, bawling my eyes out, and yelling and getting way too upset, but that's just how I felt. Unloved, like a beck and call girl, and totally had it up to here. I convince myself to stop, because I could no longer distinguish road from trees in the jumble of tears. I made it there and back to Ci's apartment by 8:30. Yes, I had my music cranked. Yes, I may have been speeding. Yes, I was still being a cautious driver.

I put Zoe to bed. She was rather quiet. I think she could tell I was not in a good mood, nor a mood to deal with her crap. I finally made dinner and ate at 9. Started my homework then too. Had to call Allie with a question on Physics. Took me an hour to do graphs that should have taken 5 minutes each. As it is now, I didn't do 2 of them, because I don't understand what I'm supposed to be doing. Then moved on to Calculus. Ci came home sometime around 10, because I had just started problem 1. Totally not in a math mood (or any homework/schoolwork in general), I finally finish the 10 or so problems at 10:55. Realizing that curfew is in 5 minutes, I bid Ci and Tigger farewell, and drive home. As you can probably tell by the time, I just got home. Still have US History homework to do, and I have to take a shower, cus I'm still all chlorine-ish. It's almost midnight. I will probably not get around to sleeping until 1:30. At least I don't have Early Bird tomorrow and can sleep until 7. *sigh* 5 and a half hours.

Sorry if this entry was long, boring, and full of details that you couldn't give a rat's ass about, but I was just so...emotional...that I had to vent somewhere. I realize that I got upset about really petty things here, but it's more of the "straw that broke the camel's back" and everything adding up, not to mention the extreme stress that I've been under lately.

*sigh* Is it Friday yet?

Current Music: You Don't See Me - Josie and the Pussycats
*The Burn - Matchbox Twenty
*That's The Way Love Goes - *NSYNC covering Janet Jackson
*Bed of Lies - Matchbox Twenty
*Put Your Arms Around Me - Texas
*The Winner Takes It All - Mamma Mia! the Musical
*Supergirl - Krystal

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