Currently, my kitty Cici is laying on my lap. She's a cutie too, but not quite as active as Tigger. I love her anyway.
I really don't want school to start. I'm really starting to dread it. Another year of boring classes and learning crap I won't remember or need again ever. To quote Lance, when asked if he had ever learned anything that proved useful later in life he said, "I was on Who Wants to Be a Millionaire and there was a question I learned in school - that was all worth it. Those four years, all for that one question." If I'm ever on Who Wants to be a Millionaire, I will be thankful for my education (and I'm sure at other points in my life), but for now, I want to stay home and sleep and watch TV and movies, and relish my summer vacation because before I know it, I will be grown up with an actual job and commitments. Blah.
I wish I had something productive to do. I would love to watch a DVD, but then I'd feel like I wasted 2 hours of my last day of summer vacation.
This is bothering me a lot more than I thought it would. I'm having a real problem with going back to school this year. I don't understand why. Perhaps it's because for the first time, I've recognized that I don't want to be in high school anymore. With so many of my friends going off to college, I don't want to be left here. I know I will have fun. I know I probably wouldn't be ready for college if I wanted to go now, but I don't want to be *here* anymore. And by *here*, I mean this town, this age, this place in my life. I really enjoyed it while it was fun, but now I just want out. I want to get out of here.
I need something to do, I'm depressing myself. I need somewhere to go and have fun and remember that it's really good to have my youth, because when it's gone, I'm going to really miss it.
Sometimes I hate being so knowledgeable? I don't know if this makes sense, but I've been told I'm mature for my age. Having older friends, and older siblings and other family kinda forced me to be older than I am. And with this comes a realization that eventually I will want childhood back, or I should be enjoying my summer, and stuff like that. I recognize that this will happen, but it sort of puts a damper on the here and now aspect. I don't think I've totally said what I wanted to, and you may not be seeing my point. Sorry.
Arg. I need to find a ride home from school tomorrow. Half-day, so I don't think I have rehearsal or anything afterward. And parents don't get home until after 4. I really wish I could park. I have a car, all I need is a permit. Stupid enrollment getting higher, and construction needed on the school. They should take away a soccer field or two, maybe one of the baseball diamonds and just make more parking. Oh well. I guess the world doesn't revolve around me. It's a sad thought (and I'm actually serious about this), when you realize that your individual problems or issues don't matter to a majority of the rest of the people in the world. The school board doesn't care that I can't park, or that I signed a petition so that my locker would be in a group with my friend's lockers. They care about adding more classes and teachers to accommodate increased enrollment. And good for them, that's what they should be worried about. However, it doesn't give me an easy way to get to and from school.
Yeah, definitely not a cheery entry. I apologize, and will subsequently stop now. Later, gators.
*Come Down - Toad the Wet Sprocket
*Broadway - Goo Goo Dolls
*Last Beautiful Girl - Matchbox Twenty
*Rhythm of the Night - Moulin Rouge Version
*You Take Away - Staind
*Some Fantastic - Barenaked Ladies
*You're A Star - Josie and the Pussycats
*Call and Answer (live) - BNL [love this song a bunch]
*Hole in my Soul - Aerosmith