Gail (gailmarie) wrote,
Gail
gailmarie

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Flies in the vasoline we are, sometimes it blows my mind

I'm tired. I got my normal 11-ish hours of sleep. What else is there to do when it's summer and I don't have a job?

I suppose I should be doing something with my life and I'm not.

I feel like I'm distancing myself from my friends, even though I see them everyday. I'm online all the time, for some reason I just keep AIM on, but half the time I don't want to talk to anyone. There are a few people that I enjoy talking with, but they aren't Nikki or Candace who IM me everyday.

Why not just turn it off? I don't know.

Usually when I realize that there is something wrong with me, or something bothers me, I try to fix it. But recently I have been finding errors and not knowing what to do with them. Should I try and make myself want to be overly social again?

I'm too good at small talk. It's the deeper, more intellectual shit that I need now. And Allie's in Alaska for three week. There are other people I like to talk to, but they are seemingly unavailable, or not at interactive as I would hope. I like conversation rather than me talking to someone without feedback.

I want in depth. All I get is trivial.

I still don't think I know who I am anymore.
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