Let's just leave it at that.
Quickly before I leave...
All-day field trip for Spring Play rehearsal. We sucked. We got yelled at a lot. For dropping lines, and not keeping pace up. For not making big choices and for not having good diction.
And of course, the past (my cast) was worse that the present, so we got reamed repeatedly.
It was long and hard.
And costuming sucked. 70's clothes...suck. A great deal. They have horrible colors and are just tacky. I'm wearing a fricking mu-mu(?) for part of it.
So that was just one big headache after another for 7 hours.
And they fucked up the Dance Show t-shirts and instead of getting normal sizes, they got "girl" sizes. So my shirt is SKIN TIGHT and I will not be wearing it tomorrow. Fuckers.
And now I have very little time before the dance show tonight (can I just say that Monday and Tuesday night shows fucking suck?). I have SO much homework to do, and I missed all of my classes today, so I'm VERY behind.
And I can't seem to settle down, no matter what I do.
My back is in knots and my stomach won't settle down. I tried chocolate, but I'm just so tired.
I've wanted to nap all day.
But I can't. Because a) I don't have time and b) that's not healthy. And my doctor discourages that. But the other fucking doctor won't call me back to set up an appointment, so I'm going it alone this week. And it sucks a great deal. [Sorry if that was too cryptic for you. It's not important, I swear.]
This is just not my week. At all. I just need a fucking hug. And some love. And someone to tell me that everything will be fine and that I'm loved and appreciated. I've had enough yelling. I've had enough stress. When do I get time?
Is it Friday yet?
Surprisingly, the night did a total 180.
I'm feeling so great right now, I can't even tell you.
In the beginning, it sucked. I got to call at 5:50 and wanted nothing more than to cry and go home. And I did cry a little (a very little) and started isolating myself by sweeping and doing all of my solo pre-show jobs. Avoiding contact as much as possible.
My savior was, I believe, the dancers. They had a lot of positive energy, and I just love them all to pieces. Sure there are the bitchy ones, but overall, they are great people.
The show went SO WELL. Like...amazingly well. And we were so ill-prepared...it was our first run-through tonight. But things went smoothly. And those that didn't? We covered for really well. We were focused and looking ahead. We had fun.
So much fun.
And afterward there was a lot of hugging and a lot of congratulations. Allie, Amanda, Zoe, Nikki, Melissa and Ben had come to the show, so it was nice to see them. And of course, I talked with Lizzie and Becca, and Becca's mom, and I saw Carly in passing. I talked to Em Baum and Gavin, who both came up for the show...to return to their respective colleges tomorrow morning.
The show ended at 9:30, but we didn't get out until 10. I was the last of the crew people to leave, and I was driving Becca home. There were only a few dancers left at that point too. And Friends of the Arts moms...who are the greatest people ever. Schoey's Mom - Cindy, Becca's Mom - Kathy and Goldy's Mom - Terri are all wonderfully funny people and great to hang around and chat with.
A REALLY good show and a lot of good karma and quite a bit of good people and Gail is feeling happy and loved once again.