April 14th, 2002


I think I've already lost you, I think you're already gone. I think I'm finally scared now.

I'm going to be making two posts. The first (this one) is going to be purely informative about my night last night (and Friday, because I never talked about it). 'Twas fun.

Friday after crew, a group of ten of us (Me, Amanda, Charlie, Goldie, Bridgette, Allie, Ben, Mulder, Candace and Caitlin) went to dinner at Portillo's in Vernon Hills. We had fun, and because we couldn't all fit at one table, had spitballs flying from one to the next. It was...you know...mature.

After, we roamed around Target, buying things on impulse and several people left with the big $2.99 rubber balls. I have no idea what they will use them for, but hey. Whatever. (And I may have bought 2 more of the 2 for $4 Ritz Bits Peanut Butter Sandwiches...boxes 5 and 6 in about 2 weeks. Damn them!)

Then, I picked up Nikki and we all went to Amanda's to hang out and watch Good Will Hunting. Laughed at the pimped out Ben Affleck in a white jogging suit. It is also what made me say "fuck" a lot after (hence the angry Honor's Society post).

Went home by midnight because I was driving people with curfews. Pfft.

Saturday: Allie and I had planned to get together to talk about things that we haven't been able to talk about around other people, or in school, or whatever.

Then in the afternoon, I got a call from JC saying that a lot of people were going to be playing Capture the Flag at a park at 7:30, and meeting for dinner at Panera at 6:30.

I tell Allie that we could go play then go back to my house later to watch Empire Records (which she had never seen). We decide to ditch out on the dinner part, mostly because I was going to be having Chinese, which didn't end up arriving until after I left, so I didn't get dinner anyway. But I can have the leftovers for lunch today.

I couldn't even tell you all the people there, because there were about 25 of us in the park after dark playing Capture the Flag. Hey, no one ever said we were cool. *laughs* But it was a lot of fun. By the end, there was a group of about 10 boys that were actually still playing and the rest of us were in two littler groups talking. We basically segregated ourselves between the bandies and non-bandies. Sad, but it happens.

So I was talking to Candace, Allie, Ben, Amanda and Peter, and we decided that we should go somewhere. After going through everyone's optional houses, I figured I'd call Mama and see if she'd allow people over. She said yes, and really, she's happy to have people over, but the house isn't big enough.

Our little group, minus Candace at the time, went to my house, were we played cards for a while, munching on Ritz Bits Sandwiches and talking. Candace showed up later and we all decided to watch Empire Records in my room. It was quite humorous to have 6 people in my room, especially when my skychair is full of clothes and over half of the floor space is taken up by crap. Thank god for a full-sized bed, which four people sat on.

Everyone but Allie left at midnight, then she and I finished the movie, talked a bit, but were dead tired, so she left around 1:15. I remember when we used to be able to stay up until 4 easily without getting tired. We are so old.

Now I'm up. Way too early in my mind, and Mama and Dadoo are down at Eastern Illinois for some Honor's award thing that my sister is in. So yeah. House to myself. I'll probably go over to Cici's later.
  • Current Music
    If You're Gone - Matchbox Twenty
Alanis - Unsexy

I was just doin' my thing, hangin' out at the spot. You know the place we go...

I'm tired today.

I mentioned in an earlier post (yesterday, I believe) that around most people, I tend to be a little louder, and sort of out going. I'm the most "rebellious" in my group of friends and they make fun of me a lot, calling me a crack whore (though I've never done drugs) and an alcoholic (though I only drink at family occasions - truth is, I've had more to drink in my life that most of my friends combined). Good kids, we are.

But it's not really who I am, and I guess it's harder for people to get close to me than they think. I'm very accepting and nice to everyone, but even if I know them pretty well, it doesn't mean they know me. I've been friends with people for 3 years...good friends, and they don't really know me. I think I'm complex.

And I'm tired today of having that wall up. Thus, my guard is down. I'm an open book. And I am tired.
  • Current Music
    Up Against the Wall (in head) - NSYNC
Kate Hudson - Lady

To the middle of my frustrated fears, and I swear, you're just like a pill.

First generic entry:

Today, Cici and I hung out. All day, practically. From about noon until 10pm.

Lots of shopping was done. We bought for shoes, and patio furniture, and a digital camera (and when I say "we bought" I mean, "Cici bought and I helped carry bags".) 'Twas fun, and my wonderful big sister bought me two new pairs of sandals. Whee!

I'm waking up in 12 hours to go to school.

Late arrival day, so classes start at 10. And they are 53 minutes with half the classes Monday, and the other half Tuesday because of an assembly. And I have no Early Bird or 1st period class. So...my class starts at 11:56. So fantastic.

Should start my weekend homework now. Maybe.
  • Current Music
    Instead of making me better, you keep making me ill