September 4th, 2001


Quicky Before Bed...

I'm tired. So soon I will sleep.

First, my take on the Tabitha's Secret thing...Jay Stanley is bitter about not being in Matchbox 20 where he would have become rich and famous with gold and (platinum?) albums. Sucks for him. And the whole re-release Don't Play With Matches is just stupid. I would have bought Act 3, with all the previously unreleased songs, but if it's only for And Around, hell with it. Stupids.

Second. Don't think there was a second. "Sailing" is on right now. Yay NSYNC. I updated my website a little today. Not a whole lot, just a little. Once I can get to my sister's scanner and wreak havoc with wedding pictures from the table cameras, there will be some on the website. After proofs in two weeks, there will definitely be some on the site. You'll just have to wait to see my gorgeous hair and makeup. Ha ha!

Three, "Bye Bye Bye" is on now. Random is never very random.

Four, I wish school wasn't starting so soon. Ew. Dread is building in my stomach now. Yuck.

All fifty-five of the bobby pins that were in my hair (did I mention it took 55 bobby pins and 3 different hair sprays to keep my wedding hair in place? Impressive, huh?). Yeah, so those are sitting on my dresser. Don't know what I will ever do with them. I don't usually use bobby pins. Oh well.

Five, my African Violet is still managing to live well in my overly-dark room. Tough little plant.

Six, Britney Spears' "Stronger" just came on. Love this song, and the vid is pretty cool too. I now have two Brit icons. The Stronger one, and the cute one. I deleted Chris and Joey icons as well as Robbie. My Robbie is gone. *sniff*

Seven, I need to find/make some new icons. With school little over 30 hours away, I should really get it done tomorrow, or I won't at all. That's just the way I am. Ambitious or Slack. One or the other. Total and Complete. No middle ground. Kinda sucks. Actually, really sucks.

Eight, too tired to think of an eight. Bed time. Night.
  • Current Music
    still Stronger - Brit

Well.....I'm awake *shrugs*

I think it's an omen when I go directly to make a "Music" playlist before even writing a subject. I don't know what that omen is for, but that's what I did.

In "Unkind", when he says: and it sets me here, it's sounds like "Unsex me here" which gives me MacBeth flashbacks. Scary, but I really like this song.

Yes, omen for musical day. Need music. 24/7. That's what sucks about school. If they had music in classrooms, or at least playing in halls during passing periods, the world would be a better place. Well, school would be a nicer place for me at least. And that's all that matters, right? Me? Mmmmm....self-centeredness...

I really want to download songs, but stupid audiogalaxy is down. What the fuck? I want to download stuff! Hee hee, Puppy Shelter here I come. *squee* ClickonJC! Ah, happiness is JC.

I'm currently eating Corn Pops. The best cereal ever. Making my fingers sticky, which is in turn, making the keyboard sticky. Oh well, casualties must be had.

I'm bored. Perhaps I will shower. Get dressed. Eat lunch (or something other than Corn Pops). Maybe go visit my sister's apartment to see Tigger.

It's my last day of freedom. I need to so *SOMETHING*. Bah.

*Sell, Sell, Sell - Barenaked Ladies
*Unkind - Tabitha's Secret
*Drops of Jupiter - Train
*Full Circle - Aerosmith
*Full Forever - Goo Goo Dolls
*Slave Girl - Goo Goo Dolls
*Black and White People - Matchbox Twenty
  • Current Music
    Getting so damn creapy just nursing this ghost of a chance

Couple things before I go cleanse myself...

I'm a really messy Corn Pops eater. No more than 5 minutes ago, I picked up 6 Corn Pops off the ground. Now, there are three more. Granted kitty likes to eat corn pops, they probably aren't really good for her, so I must throw them out.

Secondly, they should sell Frappuccinos by the gallon or something. I'll have to go to Target today. Especially if I'm going to be awake for school this week. Blah, school. Ew.
  • Current Music
    3am (piano acoustic); This Used to Be My Playground

Instant Gratifacation Girl....

Basically, I'm impatient as hell!

I'm downloading NSYNC's That Girl (Will Never Be Mine), and I want it NOW!!

Sad part is, I have a cable modem, so it only took about 25 seconds and I still couldn't stand it.

*sigh* The youth of America is getting more and more lazy with each passing day. We all suck.

Also, downloading BNL's "Conventioneers". Such a good song. Been stuck in my head forever. Must listen after NSYNC.
  • Current Music
    Humour of the Situation - Barenaked Ladies

Still Bored

Went to Ci's apartment and hung out with Tigger. That cat is the cutest. He has to be center of attention too. He was laying on the desk while I was checking my e-mail, and he would occasionally lift his head up so it would interfere with the screen. Ya know, had to make sure I knew he was still there.

Currently, my kitty Cici is laying on my lap. She's a cutie too, but not quite as active as Tigger. I love her anyway.

I really don't want school to start. I'm really starting to dread it. Another year of boring classes and learning crap I won't remember or need again ever. To quote Lance, when asked if he had ever learned anything that proved useful later in life he said, "I was on Who Wants to Be a Millionaire and there was a question I learned in school - that was all worth it. Those four years, all for that one question." If I'm ever on Who Wants to be a Millionaire, I will be thankful for my education (and I'm sure at other points in my life), but for now, I want to stay home and sleep and watch TV and movies, and relish my summer vacation because before I know it, I will be grown up with an actual job and commitments. Blah.

I wish I had something productive to do. I would love to watch a DVD, but then I'd feel like I wasted 2 hours of my last day of summer vacation.

This is bothering me a lot more than I thought it would. I'm having a real problem with going back to school this year. I don't understand why. Perhaps it's because for the first time, I've recognized that I don't want to be in high school anymore. With so many of my friends going off to college, I don't want to be left here. I know I will have fun. I know I probably wouldn't be ready for college if I wanted to go now, but I don't want to be *here* anymore. And by *here*, I mean this town, this age, this place in my life. I really enjoyed it while it was fun, but now I just want out. I want to get out of here.

I need something to do, I'm depressing myself. I need somewhere to go and have fun and remember that it's really good to have my youth, because when it's gone, I'm going to really miss it.

Sometimes I hate being so knowledgeable? I don't know if this makes sense, but I've been told I'm mature for my age. Having older friends, and older siblings and other family kinda forced me to be older than I am. And with this comes a realization that eventually I will want childhood back, or I should be enjoying my summer, and stuff like that. I recognize that this will happen, but it sort of puts a damper on the here and now aspect. I don't think I've totally said what I wanted to, and you may not be seeing my point. Sorry.

Arg. I need to find a ride home from school tomorrow. Half-day, so I don't think I have rehearsal or anything afterward. And parents don't get home until after 4. I really wish I could park. I have a car, all I need is a permit. Stupid enrollment getting higher, and construction needed on the school. They should take away a soccer field or two, maybe one of the baseball diamonds and just make more parking. Oh well. I guess the world doesn't revolve around me. It's a sad thought (and I'm actually serious about this), when you realize that your individual problems or issues don't matter to a majority of the rest of the people in the world. The school board doesn't care that I can't park, or that I signed a petition so that my locker would be in a group with my friend's lockers. They care about adding more classes and teachers to accommodate increased enrollment. And good for them, that's what they should be worried about. However, it doesn't give me an easy way to get to and from school.

Yeah, definitely not a cheery entry. I apologize, and will subsequently stop now. Later, gators.

:::Current Music:::
*Come Down - Toad the Wet Sprocket
*Broadway - Goo Goo Dolls
*Last Beautiful Girl - Matchbox Twenty
*Rhythm of the Night - Moulin Rouge Version
*You Take Away - Staind
*Some Fantastic - Barenaked Ladies
*You're A Star - Josie and the Pussycats
*Call and Answer (live) - BNL [love this song a bunch]
*Hole in my Soul - Aerosmith
  • Current Music
    "Sometimes I feel broke, and can't get fixed"

Survey Says...!

What's the best present you've ever gotten for your birthday?
I usually get fun "big" stuff, like a TV one year. Last year, I got my Visor Handspring (palm pilot), which is really cool.

Where do you live right now?
Deerfield, Illinois. It's a suburb of Chicago, about 20 miles north.

Okay, where do you live in your fantasy world?
On a beach, sipping drinks from a coconut and sleeping under a palm tree. *sigh* A relaxed life.

If you were stranded on a desert island (with Rich from Survivor stalking you) and could only take one book, what would it be and why?
Complete Idiot's Guide to Avoiding Stalkers? Nah, probably the Complete Idiot's Guide to Surviving on a Desert Island, or an issue of Rolling Stone Mag.

Same situation...what CD would you take and why?
Matchbox 20, "Yourself or Someone Like You". Because I love it to pieces, and would never ever ever get sick of listening to it.

What's the weirdest question you ever asked your parents?
I don't remember. I don't think I asked too many weird questions as a kid. By the time I was old enough to want to ask weird questions, I was smart enough not to. :o)

While in school (high school or college or both) what one class could you not wait for?
I have never dreaded going to Chorus, and I usually can't wait for English and Theatre.

What movie (or movies) could pass for the story of your life?
Geez, I don't know. I could name some songs that would. I wish I could say something cool like Almost Famous or Empire Records, but I'll have to say The Truth About Cats and Dogs.

What are you wearing right now?
cute peach tee-shirt with my awesome-fitting Limited jeans.

What's in your shower caddy?
Huge-ass bottle of Finesse Plus Shampoo/Conditioner, Bath and Body Works Country Apple shower gel, and Skintimate shave gel. Oh, and two different razors (yes, both are necessary)

Take an inventory of your refrigerator (yes, actually get up and go look inside it). What's there?
The upstairs fridge has a bunch of shit that my parents buy. Downstairs, there is a bunch of alcohol and maybe a jar of pickles. Had I not finished my Frappuccino this morning, there would have been a bottle of that too.

What's the wildest fun you've ever had?
I live a very boring life. My sister's wedding was a lot of fun though.

You're about to meet a foreign dignitary and discuss solutions to a major world problem. Who are you meeting, what's the problem, and most importantly, what are you wearing for the event?
I would be wearing a very cute and form flattering evening gown, because this is a dinner meeting. I'm probably talking to the President, because I'd feel too intimidated otherwise. We are discussing the stuff he keeps fucking up in this nation.

If you're ever going to get arrested for anything, what will it be?
Violating curfew (how sad is that?)

What's the wildest thing you'd ever do to get backstage at a concert?
I've never tried to get backstage at a concert.

If you could step outside your normal personality for a little while, what would you do?
I honestly don't know. My personality is kinda weird. I'm quarky sometimes, and reserved other. I can be outgoing, or shy. I sort of cover all the bases just being myself.

Did you ever have a crush on one of your teachers? Be honest.
Hell yes. Mr. Hibler, 7th grade Social Studies. This man was a hottie, not to mention he'd just come out of the army, so he was buff. If he gave you a detention, you would stay after and do push ups with him. Had I been able to do more than 2 push ups, I would have done something to get me into a detention.

What's the weirdest thing you ever did to your hair?
My hair for the wedding was unique, but I'd say the weirdest thing would be getting a perm (yes, I had a perm in 4th grade. It was a fashion no no, but then again, I was only 11).

Who was your best kiss ever with?
Seeing as I've never truly been kissed then I wouldn't know.

Look in your closet. What's the predominant color?
Gray and blue.

How loud is the music in your car?
On a scale from 1 to 10, I try to keep it at an 11. Right now, it's probably pretty loud. I was singing to Brit's "Stronger" while going 55 down Waukegan Road with all the windows down, and the music still drowned me out.

If you could ask your favorite celebrity one question, who would you ask and what's the question?
That's a tough one. I'd probably ask something to *NSYNC. Maybe ask Justin if he ever wished he would have grown up like a normal teenager. Then I'd probably ask him on a date, ya know, let him see what it would be like to go on a date with a normal teenager.

Did anything out of the ordinary happen to you today?
I invaded my sister's apartment without her knowing, but that's not really abnormal. I do it a lot. And she always finds out through Journal.

What's the biggest library fine you've ever paid?
$11. I had 3 books on Hernando De Soto for over month after they were due. It was for a report in 5th grade. I was even a slack back then (that I never took the books back). [The fines were about 10 cents per day per book. Ouch.]

Shakespeare - brilliant or a bunch of crap?
I wouldn't go straight to "brilliant", but he's very good.

Describe your ideal mate.
*sigh* Anything male that moves? No, I'd say he would have to be kind and caring. Funny, understanding, a little crazy, carefree, responsible (to make up for me not being very responsible). It would be nice if he were good looking too.

On which wrist do you wear your watch?

How young is your youngest friend?

How old is your oldest friend?

What do you eat that most people would consider nasty?
Peanut butter and bacon sandwiches. They are a family thing and perfect for any meal. You couldn't get more fat in there if you tried.

List your guilty pleasures, whatever they may be.
*NSYNC slash, MB20 slash, NSYNC in general is basically a guilty pleasure

You just found a $20 bill. What do you do with it?
Take a trip to Best Buy and buy a CD or DVD (or both and end up spending more than I found)

If your favorite celebrity propositioned you for a one night stand, would you do it?
Yes. Why would anyone say no?

What's the worst name you can think of, boy and girl?
Girl: Henrietta
Boy: Randolph

Are the undies in your panty drawer wild and crazy or conservative and boring?
Boring, but colorfully conservative.

Bush or Gore?
Clinton for a third term!!! (I would have voted for him again)

Why do you get up in the morning?
I ask myself that most mornings. Because if I don't, I feel like I wasted the entire day. And starting tomorrow I'll have school.

What's your dream job?
Anything to do with Disney, *NSYNC, or TV/Theatre. It would be awesome to work for MTV, VH1 or Rolling Stone.

What's the hardest drug you've ever tried?
I was prescribed Vicatin for my broken foot. It made me sick, so I stopped taking it after 3 pills. (My friends say I should sell the rest, and if that weren't so illegal, I would)

Have you ever stopped watching a movie before it was over?
Sliding Doors, I just couldn't bring myself to finish it.

What keeps you sane?
Friends, family, my cat, writing, Journal, music

If you could live in any other time of history, when would it be and why?
I think it would be cool to have lived in the early 1900s, or the late 60s/early 70s.

At what time of day are you the most creative?
Unfortunately, anytime after 10pm, but then I have all these great ideas and if I follow through with them, I'm up until 3am and I don't get any sleep and it's really a crisis.

What's the most danger you've ever been in?
I was in a car in the middle of a tornado. When I was in about 3rd grade, we were traveling to visit my grandma and had to stop in a parking lot while the tornado went though. I don't remember being really scared, but it was dangerous.
  • Current Music
    Burn - Jo Dee Messina

Gah...last night of freedom...

*sigh* I've almost come to grips with the fact that school is starting tomorrow. Talked on the phone to Caitlin and Steph. Makes me happy that I will be able to see them everyday. And Steph can give me rides to school on any non-Early Bird day. And Caitlin is going to lunch with Me, Amanda, and Zoe tomorrow, so I'll be getting a ride from her.

And, I decorated my assignment book. Well, the back of it at least. Last year, I made a collage of magazine words and pictures and stuff on the cover and back of it. It made me happy, because it was all personalized-like and me. I figured I would do the same this year, because it makes me happy to look at. Happiness is always a good thing.

I think I might add myself to my friends list. That way, I can see the icons I use easier, plus, I love reading my own Journal. It makes me laugh, or at least just smile. Makes me happy. Yay for more happiness. I was also thinking about adding a bunch of people that are on my sister's friends list. I love reading their journals, and it's more work to go and though and switch her name for mine in the URL. Laziness. Yum.

AHHHH!!!! So my sister said that Aerosmith was coming back to Chicago, so I checked and nothing. Then I go to their website and nothing. Then I go to, and tickets go on sale Saturday to see Aerosmith at the Allstate Arena on Oct. 23. It's a Tuesday, but I currently have nothing going on. I wanted to go sooooooo bad when they came before. Allie too. They are Allie's favorite band of all time. They are to her like Matchbox Twenty is to me. We would give our souls for these bands. She couldn't go though, because she was in Costa Rica. She's going to faint when I tell her they are coming back. Tickets are $75, but I really want to go. I'll have to talk to her tomorrow. Nikki and I were going to see them at Alpine on the lawn, but we decided two 16-year old girls on the lawn at Alpine for an Aerosmith concert was less than smart. In retrospect, we should have gone. I've been given a second chance at this. I can't blow it. I must go.

*sigh* I love concerts. I love Aerosmith. Steven Tyler is awesome. Joe Perry is a god (but not with bad short hair like he had a couple years ago).

Was I going to say something before the Aerosmith thing interceded? I think so, but I can't remember now. Oh, excitedness. They are getting old. This might be their last tour ever.

I was thinking about buying a little CD player from Target or where ever. Something battery powered, so that we can listen to music before school in the mornings. I have been so music oriented all summer. Listening to anything and everything I can. Seeing every concert I was able to get tickets to. How can I go back to days without music? I would shrivel up and die. And that would suck. Either that, or I just buy those mini-speaker things for my mp3/CD diskman thing.

I should probably go to bed soon. I have to be up in 8 hours. I will be in a class in 9. That sucks a lot. Especially since it's physics. I don't think I will do well in physics. I've always sucked at it. Much better at biology or chemistry, and I only managed a B in those. Physics is going to be bad.

I will at least attempt to be in bed in a half hour. I will update tomorrow in regards to my first day of blecky school. Until then, fare thee well.

:::Music of My Heart (or mp3 player):::
*That's When I'll Stop Loving You - *NSYNC
*Interstate Love Song - Stone Temple Pilots
*Girl Like That (live) - Matchbox 20
*Jesus Was an Alien - Tabitha's Secret
*So Removed - Blue Sky Roadster
*Conventioneers - Barenaked Ladies (yeah new mp3!)
*Elderly Woman Behind the Counter in a Small Town - Pearl Jam
*When I Fall - Barenaked Ladies (*aww* love this song)
  • Current Music
    When life hands you lemons,make lemonade(but add your sugar)

Yay for Friends Page!!!

Just added 6 new friends. That makes me happy. Happiness is friends.

Happiness is listening to That Girl (Will Never Be Mine) on repeat. Hee hee, JC's "mine" at the end makes me smile, and his "way!" (around 2:45) where he has a little descant part makes me *squee*

Puppies. I miss them. Wish PopOdyssey was still touring. *sigh*

There has been a lot of happiness going on lately. Yay! Happiness is happiness. Geez, I sound like some sort of inspirational speaker. But it's true. Happiness is good.
  • Current Music
    ...She's in a different league, they say it's no use...

So what?

Okay, so I failed miserably at that "bed time by 11:30" thing. Wanna make something of it? You steppin'? You steppin', you fallin'.

Yeah, so friends page is pretty, but silly me, forgot to add myself. Will do that, then bed. I promise. For real this time. Night Night! :o)
  • Current Music
    Alright - Five For Fighting