I am walking home right now, from the blockbuster that is 2 miles away from my apartment.

This post is happening coutesy of my sidekick.

It has been an extremely busy few days, though there are only three things I've been doing.

1) writing a paper on aristotle and whether a wall can form by chance

2) writing a paper on kit fine's radical quasi-holist solution to frege's puzzle

3) writing a paper on Thomas Reid, who argued that the things we see are chairs and tables, not ideas of chairs and tables. I was defending the view that we see ideas of chairs and tables (sort of)

Other things that have been happening include: cooking chicken, working out.

I will be in the bay area on saturday, first palo also, the oakland. My brother has some conference there, so he will be coming in from DC.

I get back wednesday and my parents arrive thursday. No matter how much time I spend cleaning my apartment before I go, that will be pretty much the main thing I do from wednesday night until my parents arrive.

I have a comprehensive exam in philosophy of language coming up, the first week of june. This will be background stress until my parents leave town, at which point it will dominate my entire being. The tes is this: we have gone through a 68 item reading list. The study guide is
25 questions. The day of the exam we will be given a subset of those questions, with instructions on how to select 4ish from that subset (I.e. 2 from this section and one fromthis other section, etc.) We will then have 24 hours to write out our answers. (We, by the way is me and another grad student, eduardo). 2 days later there will be an oral examination, primarily, but not exclusively, focused on perceived weaknesses in our written exams.

So yeah, the beginning of my summer is going to be pretty relaxing.

ps: I took my first ever for-realsies incomplete this semester. The kit fine paper just wasn't going to happen before the due date. Incompletes, fyi, carry no real penalty. The main problem with them is that it is too easy to get out of the groove for the relevant class, and wind up writing the paper a year later without the benefit of having just spent a semester thinking about it. I am finishing the fine paper in the second week of june, at the latest. I am going to bring it with me to san fran so I can work on it when I have free time.

Recommendation: grad school is really only for people who truly love to academically engage with the subject they will be studying, especially if they want to do it right.

This is a 'comic' explaining the sub-prime crisis. From my limited understanding, it is relatively accurate, but if anyone knows more than me, they should feel free to let me know if it gets things wrong.

There will be a tons-awesome party involving me in August.

Probably around August 8th or 9th.

You know why?

One year of serious self improvement, that's why. August 8th will be the 367th consecutive day of working out.

Interestingly, most of the people who read my LJ aren't from around LA, so if you are reading this, it is unlikely you will be attending my party.

Here are the things I got at whole foods today:

items primarily for breakfast:
lite muesli (a bunch from the bulk bins)
silk original soy milk (I genuinely prefer it to regular milk)
bananas

items primarily for lunch:
whole wheat tortilllas (for sandwich wraps)
boneless chicken breast (to be cooked all at once and used in making the wraps)
some sort of barbecue sauce
a couple bags of mixed vegetables that will be good in a wrap with chicken and barbecue sauce

items primarily for dinner:
eggs
mixed vegetables that would be good for stir fry
basmati brown rice
soy sauce

other assorted items:
canola oil
toasted sesame oil
another sauce I can't remember
sea salt
agave

Bonus trip:
After whole foods, I stopped at Costplus World market to get a wok and some wok-friendly utensils

I am going to learn to eat in moderation:

Here is my general plan:
breakfast: muesli w/soy milk and banana
lunch: barbecue chicken wrap
dinner: veggie + egg stir fry

The first step of my plan, which effectively begins tomorrow, is to regiment three meals a day of relatively fixed sizes. I am, unlike many people, perfectly content to eat the same thing pretty much every day, especially once it becomes a habit. This is good, because it makes it easier to regiment my meals in the way I intend.

Step two, which comes after I have accustomed myself to the target meal structures and food quantities, is to systematically introduce more variety. I.e. each time I go shopping, I must purchase such-and-such new things, and incorporate them into my meals. Etc.

Because I am implementing my plan in this fashion, recommendations of good foods to eat and explore from others will be good eventually, just not at this stage.

By the by, let me just interject for a second on the wonders of exercise.
If I were to detail my soon-to-be-former eating habits here, which I do not plan to, it would be quite apparent that exercise alone, without any semblance of a sane or healthy diet, has a huge impact on health, weight, and appearance. In fact, reflecting on my diet now, I am pretty much astonished that I am not still gaining weight. Exercise is a lot like practicing an instrument that way. I never feel like individual practice sessions are improving my general flute skills, but there is a cumulative effect (I totally feel like the practice sessions individually help me master particular exercises or the like, I'm talking about tone, breath control, etc.)

also I got a haircut that I am very happy with yesterday

This is not about pregnancy, it is instead, about how a couple days ago, I hit the nine month mark of daily exercise. Yay.

I am deeply entrenched in the paper writing part of the semester now, with one paper that I hope to have done tomorrow, one paper due the 12th, and one paper due the 14th. I plan to get no incompletes this semester, so I have a lot of paper writing work ahead of me in the next week.

Also, my friend Kory, who is another grad student in the department, but who went to culinary school before coming here, has agreed to help me figure out a daily meal plan, that is, a single plan that I can do every day. The goal, in part, is to train myself towards eating in moderation by giving myself a fixed menu of reasonable portions. Just as I was able, with the right sort of rigid guidelines, to incorporate exercise into my life, I am now going to commence incorporating dietary change. The first thing to tackle, is portions. I do not eat nearly moderately enough, and the way to fix that, I think, is to just have such rigid requirements on what I can eat that moderation is enforced. Once I have trained myself to be accustomed to reasonable portions, I will commence working on increased variety, and tearing down some of my other dietary bad habits.

Kory's role is to help me make sure the fixed diet I am proposing isn't criminally unhealthy, and is at least in principle sustainable.

It is worth noting that I will not be strictly observing the plan when I go out to eat. Part of the plan requires me not to constantly go out to eat, but when I do go out to eat, I will not be restricted by the meal plan.

At any rate, this represents another phase of my trajectory of self-improvement. Conquering my weaknesses with respect to eating will be, I think, a more difficult task than conquering my weaknesses with respect to lethargy, but, at this point, I have pretty well internalized the sense of empowerment and autonomy necessary to be confident that I can train myself to be the sort of person I want to be.

It starts Saturday.

First off in the awesome news, I'm watching an episode of "Murder, She Wrote" featuring a very young Neil Patrick Harris. Je s'adore.


Second, today was pretty awesome because I spent it at Epcot in celebration of Cinqo de Mayo. We lunched at Mexico and drank at nearly every other country. Lovely.


Third, both my birthday and my half-birthday are holidays. Like, real ones...not "Sweethearts' Day" or "May Day." Who else can say that? Neither are American holidays, though...damn.

[For the curious, the aforementioned holidays are Guy Fawkes' Day and Cinqo de Mayo. Rock.]


Fourth, I like the idea of being able to watch tv episodes online, but it's been my experience that most of the network websites are crap. Except ABC. ABC.com's full episode videos are the most reliable and easy to use of any major site. Well done, ABC.


That is all.

Exciting news (well, not that exciting)...

I went to Borders earlier to waste time before a movie and they had some bargain bins up front. I rooted around and found a bunch of books that a) sounded interesting, b) are supposed to be good, and/or c) I'd thought about buying previously.

So, for $4 each, I bought (in paperback):
The Ruins of California by Martha Sherrill
Bride Island by Alexandra Enders
The Saffron Kitchen by Yasmin Crowther
The Historian by Elizabeth Kostova

And despite some of those titles, none of them are crappy, women's beach-reads. Though I didn't notice until now that they are all female authors. Interesting.

For $6, I got Charmed Thirds by Megan McCafferty (it was more expensive because it's hardcover). And this one is a frivolous read, but I had the first two a while back and remember enjoying them immensely. So I figured I'd take the chance.

Then, as an impulse buy while in line, I picked up Ella Enchanted (the DVD), on sale for $8. Alright, so it's not a great movie, but Anne Hathaway and Hugh Dancy in a silly fairy tale? Why not?


After, I went to see Priceless, a French comedy with Audrey Tautou and Gad Elmaleh (of The Valet fame). It was cute. Could have been better, it felt a little disjointed...like they weren't quite sure what the focus of the film should be. But it was interesting and fun.

So I've been marathoning "The Office" (seasons two and three yesterday and today). And I do really enjoy the show. It's fantastic, though not my favorite. I like "How I Met Your Mother" better. And "Psych" beats it out, too.

Probably because Michael Scott is my least favorite character. Sometimes he can be funny and most of the time he's not incredibly annoying, but he can be so over the top and awkward. That's hard to watch. I love almost everyone else better. Creed, Kevin, Oscar, Angela, Dwight, Toby, Meredith, and even Ryan the douchebag. And it really goes without saying that Jim and Pam are my favorite(s) (either as a couple or separate). I mean...come on. They alone are worth watching the show.


Though that's not the point of this post. What I meant to say before I got off on my tangent was that they have really interesting people writing and directing episodes of the show.

I watched one last night directed by Joss Whedon. And the one I'm watching now was directed by J.J. Abrams. Whoa and what? A bit of a different genre for those guys, but totally awesome none the less.

And I suppose it makes sense that the writers would come from the creative team behind "The Office," and guys who write themselves into the show as well. B.J. Novak is credited as the show's creator, as well as a producer, has written episodes, and plays Ryan. Paul Lieberstein is a co-executive/consulting producer, episode writer, and Toby.

I don't know if people pay attention to the little white credits that flash across the bottom of the screen, but I do. And I think that's really cool and crazy interesting.

So...this is REALLY geeky...but...

It's the third of May, 2008.

Which is exactly 200 years to the day from the events portrayed by Francisco Goya in his painting "Third of May, 1808" (which he actually completed in the year 1814).


Oh yeah. Art History is my life.

Oy.

I'm lame. But every time I've checked the date today, it's come into my head.

Sam: "I really like her and she's not what you think."
Josh: "The only thing I know about her is she's a call girl. Is she a call girl?"
Sam: "Yes."
Josh: "Then so far she's exactly what I think."

I forgot how good season 1 of West Wing can be.

Sorkin knows how to write dialogue.

Mark: Hey, if you were sleeping with Rose, I could understand why you're spending time with her, but you're not. And it's... it's just I thought that uh... you know. I thought it was just gonna be you and me!
Derek: Having sex?
Mark: After! After Addison, after Meredith. I have been patient. I have waited when you partnered up with these chicks, but now they're over. And it's supposed to be just us! You and me; two guys on the prowl, on the hunt.
Derek: You're having trouble getting laid. And you need my help.
Mark: I can get laid.
Derek: Mm-hmm.
Mark: I can get laid whenever I want.
Derek: Uh-huh.
Mark: I do get laid whenever I want.
Derek: Uh-huh.
Mark: That's the point. Women are everywhere. I only have one person I can talk to.
Derek: That's sweet.
Mark: Shut up!
Derek: No, it was really warm and fuzzy; very sweet.
Mark: Shut up.


So after that long intro...I wanted to discuss a bit of "Grey's Anatomy." (Feel free to skip the rest of this entry if you are not a "Grey's" fan.)

I was initially sad when I discovered Kate Walsh would be "returning to Seattle Grace," which I assume means that "Private Practice" has been cancelled. I had been enjoying "Private Practice" more than "Grey's" lately for the simple fact that it was less dramatic and more fun and Tim Daly is ridiculously good looking (especially given his age). Though I am glad that Addison isn't being dropped entirely. I do love her so.

[Edit: I just saw a commercial that "Private Practice" is returning in the fall. So ignore all of that...and yay! Tim Daly and his 52-year-old sexiness will be returning.]

And when I watched an episode of "Grey's" from January (three episodes ago), I was disheartened by the amount of drama and found my favorite parts were Mark Sloan and Erica Hahn (with whom I'm secretly in love).

I'm glad that Derek and Meredith have split up. I was a supporter of theirs for so long, and I have always been a staunch Meredith-lover despite her crazy commitment-phobic-ness (or possibly because of it, because I see a lot of myself in her). However, it got to the point where she was backpedaling and protesting and digging her heals in the sand too much. He had been patient. He waited. She was given the time and if she doesn't feel sure about things yet...it's time to cut loose. I still love Derek (who doesn't love some McDreamy), but Meredith is falling by the wayside.

So I'm concerned. I feel less for the characters than I used to. Their neuroses tend to piss me off more than make me like them, and I'm hoping for some changes in their lives/behaviors. I think a good example is George. After his disastrous marriage to Callie (who I only like now because of her relationship to Hahn), his awkward fling with Izzie, and his failure of the residency exam, I'm really glad he's moved in with Lexie. He can get passed the drama and the really crappy parts of his life/character and try to get back to the good old George we all knew and loved. It's Etch-a-Sketch style, perhaps, just dropping everything and moving on...but I think it's what the show needs.

I do have a good feeling that it will try to return to the humor and lightness that it had when the series began. I liked it because it was mostly a comedy with a little seriousness peppered in. It wasn't all train wrecks and ferry disasters and depressing storyline after depressing storyline. It was witty and interesting, and the characters were fucked up in really good and fascinating ways.

But I'm still concerned. Concerned that the characters will not change. Concerned that the plot will continue down the strictly dramatic route and forget its roots. And if that happens, maybe I'll be able to start watching "The Office" and "30 Rock" on a weekly basis, because "Grey's" will fall from my TiVo's To-Do List.


Just some thoughts.

http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2008/05/080502082735.htm

From a source quoted in the article:

"A person's level of self-efficacy determines how hard they try and how long they stick at things in the face of difficulties. People with high self-efficacy are motivated and optimistic - when the going gets tough, they keep going."

"People with low self-efficacy avoid difficult tasks and when things get tough they are more likely to give up. We can improve our self-efficacy by developing skills, having role models and getting encouragement from others."


the article is mostly about women's health in particular, but I assume the self-efficacy link is cross-gender